Steven Pan, the father of the murdered Eline, cries out in an open letter his indignation about the punishment that his ex-wife of the commercial court of Leuven has been. Neurochirurge Mehrnaz Didgar was yesterday sentenced to five years imprisonment for the murder of their daughter, Eline. It was only the pretrial effectively pronounced. Today if Didgar the prison leave.

For Eline, for my flower…

Read also Neurochirurge should not go to the cell: the five-year reprieve for murdering her daughter (14)

A new day. A other day. The second day of spring.

this Morning I got up and I took a cold shower. But waking could not. Has anyone a scientific article? Dazed by the use sleeping pills and broken emotions of the entire week, with the climax at the end of the Process. The cold water had hopefully enough effect to awaken me to realize what happened. “Is it behind the back? What happened?”. My eyes opened this morning and I saw my dear Sarah tossing and watching on her smartphone. She had really not slept. She felt defeated just as many people that resentful feeling expressed in all sorts of forums on social media.

‘Has it all been for nothing?’ asked Sarah to me? “We have worked together so many hours on this talk. You have so many days with your lawyers talked and fought to a serene process to prepare?’.

Bewildered, embittered and disenchanted. So we remained behind. The dense fog this morning was an expression of tears that evaporate on the warm ground, by the first rays of sun yesterday about the plain seemed.

What is a child worth? What was Eline worth? A child with so much love gave. Eline was the extension of her mother? A child that so many fought. A child with a second chance earned. In the courtroom, I heard the following statement from the defense: ‘Lady Justice is wearing a blindfold that is wet, wet of tears.” I am as of today more than anyone believe. The verdict has fallen: guilty of killing with intent to kill, in short, a murder that is premeditated. The penalty at the end was basically (my interpretation): ‘go unpunished’. You have 22 months in the cell, sat down, and that is enough. The weight of the punishment was in the scales laid. But Lady Justice was already crying. The scale hit tilt, fell to the ground and was broken. Yeah. It was late in the evening to get a new scale to purchase to the severity of the penalty and the value of the child, the suffering of the father and the relatives to put in them. They could go on. She is now a free man with a label of murderess. There are, however, conditions imposed, but believe me, they will respect them, for the next 5 years.

Fifteen minutes long, and the breath afsnoeren of a defenseless vulnerable child where everything with ‘premeditation’ was prepared, was not sufficient to someone in the cell. I would not like to have a child in this society. Poor children. Eline is not there anymore. Never more. I can and should no longer protect against the hard and gruesome society. Because this is also the image that master Vermassen yesterday outlined of our society. I hope that all the people present in the chamber in the mirror and dare to see and meet her in the eyes dare to look. “I have a heart under this gown and I’ve got respect for you’, told the defense humbly bowing after my testimony the last few days. ‘You have this feeling still, master?’. You mentioned that this victory is the icing on the cake? Regrettable choice of words. In his case summed up some of the ‘liars’, with Eline on the 3rd place: ‘champagne to the gods to give to the meditation of the mom… allez say. That can not’. And the cock crowed for the third time? Because the event had a very sacred atmosphere. A lot of people had the feeling that mama almost canonized by many witnesses. Good, better and best. Superlatives. Can these people all looking in the mirror? People expressed their opinion on whether or not you, as a mother, it’s true, your own child or children may be killed as a sign of the ultimate mother love. Amazed, surprised with a bleeding heart, you need to understanding responses to listen. Suggested no one in the room is the question of whether the father, family or friends this life?

The mother herself gave clearly stated that the prison virtue had done and that she found a way to live without Eline. She has ‘peace’. The Bible has apparently helped. Just for the act she had read the Bible and forgiveness asked for the horrific act that she was going to say: the child poison and choke. ‘Peaceful’ expired, they stated afterwards. ‘Her sins, which are forgiven’, so the decision myself but then. How should I and so many people here peace of mind? The mother is Eline from her unbearable suffering. Eline has the pills, itself taken. Also that slide them away. The Evil came to pass, but ‘deliver us Lord of all Evil’… I’ve a new Evil now. Live by them and you lay it down… we have a choice? Is it behind the back? Not for me but for the rugchirurg.

Yesterday I declared to the press: we have heard the voice of Eline sound, and we have hoped for a serene and dignified process. But the end had my attorneys and myself are not in the hand. There is a decision. ‘I dare to meet her in the eyes. We have done everything we can, what is within us was. The pieces of the puzzle layers on the table. But I have a feeling that the pieces are not sufficiently large. The attorney wore a well-founded sentence of 26 years for the most serious offence. A heavy punishment for a serious crime. We are steps to the outside with the idea that they are 22 months spent in the cell. Months for years or years for months. We were tired but had the us not made a mistake.