Marianne wants to tell openly of the difficult decision, which many is silent.Marianne decided to interrupt the pregnancy, because the fetus was found to severe brain injury. Stock. Most of the Photo

Years ago, Marianne , 26, and her spouse made a big decision: a second child would finally be welcome. The little sibling of four-year-old eldest son wasn’t a walkover, because the previous pregnancy in the mid-Marianne violently ill to ulcerative colitis and the need for strong medication. Finally last year, in the autumn the disease had been brought under control so that the doctor gave permission for a new pregnancy.

Soon Marianne saw that she was pregnant. The first few months everything went normal. Pregnancy week 12 ultrasound showed the stomach to grow normally in a developing fetus.

Pregnancy in the mid-Marianne arrived at the second ultrasound examination. Too smooth at first great midwife when fetal bones and internal organs. Moving to examine the head and brain area, he got really serious.

I Panicked when the midwife said she had to get to the scene of the doctor. Also, the doctor was confused and said, a little awkwardly, that I had never seen anything like it, Marianne says.

Marianne got a referral for further study in Helsinki Meilahti hospital fetal research unit, in which the situation would estimate the industry specialists.

when I Left the maternity rooms below me said just that ”remember that you can always have an abortion”. I was shocked and in a state of shock.

Before admission to the studies meilahti of Marianne is booked for a private clinic, because the thirst for more information. He hoped that there would be able to tell you more than the home of the county hospital. Also the second doctor could not say more, than that the situation was serious.

Difficult decisions

the Following week in Meilahti, it was found that the Marianne range of fetal brain had serious structural flaws. Parents not able to provide any sort of life expectancy.

it Was pretty obvious that there is no other possibility than to terminate a pregnancy. I couldn’t think that I would let the pregnancy continue to the end and give birth to a child who may not live an hour longer, or was your devices connected throughout his life. It was a difficult decision, but I had three different doctors tell you as the knowledge that fetal brain development was so badly disturbed that the future had. It support my decision. I have always been rational and made the decision rationally, Marianne told me.

Marianne and her husband had discussed this topic already before the beginning of the pregnancy, so the situation real isoiduttua suspension decision making no longer requires a long cooling-off time.

Still, we wonder exactly whether our solution correct or should I pregnancy give in spite of everything continues. I know already that’s when my stomach kicks, and I was attached to the fetus.

Marianne thank Meilahti hospital staff attitude in the couple’s decision.

There were all cordial and take people as people. With them I felt safe.

after the Investigation of Marianne to get to discuss the matter with my midwife, who helped the abortion-related licensing matters and paperwork. He also told me what was going to happen and steered the conversation help sources. Marianne felt that her left alone a great thing.

”I don’t want to hide”

pregnancy week 21 to do an abortion was both psychologically and physically heavy and the medication in spite of a painful event.

after an Interruption Marianne was asked if she would like to see the body. He refused, because he didn’t want it to stay as the only mind kuvakseen baby. Marianne asked the hospital to take care of burial-related issues.

– It is not a little regretted in hindsight. But at that moment I was in such a state of mind, that I wanted to quickly get out of that situation.

a Couple of days after the suspension Marianne suffered painful complications and lost a lot of blood. The mental recovery, however, was much body healing slower.

– feeling side was pretty varied. The firstborn tried to keep the everyday routine catch.

Marianne went back to work a couple of weeks after. The spouses were each other’s support, and Marianne gained the power to also discuss the other close with. The couple is told the events of close friends openly.

– Although this is a personal thing, I don’t want to hide it. I want that people are aware of such things which do not appear on the site.

for the Same reason, Marianne wants to tell their story also night magazine readers. He himself try to look for peer support on the internet, but notes that stories of the same experience from just found. The subject is to remain silent.

Maybe people do not want these terrible talk. They are really personal and sensitive issues. I think that parents can also feel some kind of guilt about it, that the fetus has become a serious developmental disorder, which due to pregnancy, it has been decided to interrupt so late in the week. Just might be other people’s reactions and the culprit, Marianne thinks.

Cause in the dark

after the Abortion of the fetus was done the autopsy, which aimed to identify brain structural abnormalities reason. Suspect was from the parents hereditary genetic defects due to a rare syndrome, due to which samples were sent for examination to Germany. Suspect turned out to be false.

Because either the chromosome is not found anything unusual, according to experts, the best estimate is that the fertilisation of the moment something happened, which caused the development of the disorder.

– We are left in doubt feel. We had hoped to get a clear answer about what happened. It unfortunately was left in the dark, Marianne said.

however, He noted that the autopsy information received was relief, because they convinced a couple of the most difficult decision was the correct one.

Hope and fear

Research has been completed Marianne and her husband were given permission to start trying new pregnancy.

Scary is that the brain starts to develop properly only 16. weeks of pregnancy after. Before abnormalities can not be seen. It was however a relief that we did not find the suspect gene error. It would have raised the threshold of a new pregnancy trying for a very high level, Marianne said.

the Couple has decided that a new pregnancy will get started if it is started. Marianne, according to their nervous, but both want to believe that the bad experience was a one-time, and the next time all will go well.

– If something similar would happen for the second time, I don’t think I’d be able to try again very quickly. It would have to be happy about it, that is one healthy child already, rejoice and focus on him.

the Events remind Her of the fact that nothing is self-evident.

– It is not so, that of course comes a healthy baby, or, of course, easily become pregnant. This taught me never to trust one hundred percent to any.

Before these events Marianne had always thought, that would not want to do ever have an abortion if you get pregnant accidentally. In this situation, however, it was Marianne and her husband believes that the only real solution. Now Marianne wondered why it all happened.

– When an event feels like the end of the world. Now, half a year after the worst of the grief is left behind, but it will rise to thoughts once in a while. I’ve often wondered, why this happened to us. Have I done something, what caused it? Many of the same have been passed, probably wondering the same thing.