Are you dealing with a pressing issue and want to hear someone else’s opinion? Every week, Metro shares a reader’s dilemma. This week, we have Marieke, a 30-year-old who keeps falling for ‘wrong’ men.
Marieke describes her love life as quite turbulent. Her friends sometimes enjoy it because it’s never boring. She has experienced many intense and exciting things, but she realizes that not everyone leads such a tumultuous love life.
Marieke is one of those people who are attracted to the wrong types of men. The ‘bad boy’, the ‘rascal’, the man with a bad reputation, or the unreliable man. Both of her exes were not exactly saints. Her first boyfriend had a very intense personality, and their relationship was full of arguments, shouting, drama, and even physical altercations, but it would then turn into passionate sex, excitement, and fireworks. It took her a long time to truly move on from this relationship because it was unhealthy.
Her second partner was possibly even worse. Their relationship started as some sort of affair and was also intense. This guy manipulated and cheated. The whole situation caused Marieke a lot of pain and heartache.
In between her relationships, there were always flings. Men with whom she had brief relationships. Again, her life was never boring. She always met people with the wildest lives: artists, wealthy individuals, party animals, ‘free spirits’, and more colorful characters. She had ‘secret’ loves, led a wild and extremely exciting sex life, and had a brief ‘situation’ with a professional footballer. And there are many more stories that she experienced.
Marieke’s friends sometimes enjoy her stories, but at the same time, she feels judged by others when her life becomes extreme and occasionally turns into a complete mess. She is tired of always falling for the wrong types of men and now wants a reliable, kind, and good man.
The dilemma here is that she doesn’t feel anything for the ‘nice guys’. She has tried dating different types of men, but she quickly gets bored, feels no excitement, and is put off by insignificant things.
Marieke is thirty and fed up with all the drama and chaos. The ‘rascals’ she has encountered are all toxic, and they have caused her a lot of pain, sadness, and unrest. She truly wants a healthy relationship with a man, but her attraction to the ‘good guys’ is lacking. Sometimes she fears that she will never have a loving relationship. How can she get out of this situation?
What do you think Marieke should do? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page or Instagram! The responses will be published next week.
Last Week
Last week, Metro readers gave advice on the dilemma of Lucas, a 27-year-old whose in-laws have high expectations of him. Various readers offered their perspectives and suggestions on how Lucas could address the situation with his partner and her family.
Ineke advised Lucas to have a conversation with his girlfriend first to understand her perspective. Myra emphasized the importance of finding a balance that both partners are comfortable with. Kim provided an example of what Lucas could say to his partner to express his feelings. Ricardo reminded Lucas that he is not obligated to do anything he doesn’t want to do. Phillip suggested having a conversation with his partner about the overwhelming situation. Nancy encouraged Lucas to stand up for himself and express his need for alone time with his partner.
In conclusion, it’s essential for Lucas to communicate openly with his partner and set boundaries that work for both of them in dealing with the expectations of his in-laws.
Additional Information:
It’s important for individuals like Marieke to reflect on their past relationships and identify patterns in their attraction to certain types of partners. Seeking therapy or counseling can also be beneficial in understanding underlying issues that may contribute to these patterns. Building self-awareness and self-worth can help individuals like Marieke break the cycle of falling for the wrong types and attract healthier relationships in the future. Remember, it’s never too late to make positive changes in your love life.