On THE 7th of February is the National Day against bullying . An important moment, asking, once again, to raise the awareness of all to empathy, i.e. the ability to get in touch with the feel of the other so that it becomes an essential ingredient of respect for the other. The numbers of bullying and cyberbullying , despite the laws have helped a lot to combat the two phenomena, they must still keep our attention. In Italy, three students out of five are victims of violence or threats, as shown by Istat in the course of a hearing at the parliamentary Commission for childhood and adolescence. More than 50% of the boys between 11 and 17 years reported having been the victim of an episode that is offensive, disrespectful or violent, in the last twelve months. 20% of them said they had bullied one or more times per month. Most of all, are affected girls.
But what is bullying , and why in spite of what you are doing you are still unable to curb the the whole phenomenon? It is an act of exclusion by the company of a particular person. It is based on three important aspects: intentionality, duration, and asymmetry in the relationship. Aspects indicate that you may pour out their aggression on someone else because, according to the bully is skinny, fat, tall, short, beautiful, ugly, smart, stupid, has no objects or clothing that have all or none, has a family with fewer economic capacity and all kinds of other reasons that can generate a vexation and a repeat of his teasing. Bullying manifests itself in a public place, in a classroom, in the courtyard of the school, a local, or in a square as an example. And when the bully acts, a step behind him, always has a court of spectators and supporters.
cyerbullismo that, always according to Istat data, affecting 22.2% of all the victim of bullying, has a square wider than the one that have the bullies out of the network. the You can implement and perpetrate 24/24 hours, it expands like an oil stain in the chat , on social or other channels that kids have at their disposal. Sometimes, unfortunately, ending with epilogues dramatic, as we were told in the chronicles. Not infrequently, the cyberbully behaves that way because he was a victim of bullying in turn. Bullies and cyberbulli may have had an education very permissive and do not have the sense of the border, or to the contrary, they can be grown inside a family very hard and pour out their aggression on classmates, friends, or acquaintances.
sometimes, they are also adults who behave like bullies: we think that the message receives a child that sees the parent always park in a double row, hindering the exit of another car, or hear him make fun of someone for how they dress, or what it says. Or still, to boast of having excluded someone from a chat because he was obnoxious to this or that other reason.
Are examples, of course. And could continue for a long time. To the great, the tip is to pay attention to the changes of the children, know their friends, because it happens often that you have with them, invite the children to not be afraid to tell their fears. We do not make the error to minimize is never what we tell the children with phrases like: “don’t make the case, or what you want it to be?!”. Then, we denounce to the competent Bodies, this is the first thing to do. Don’t judge the guys, we discuss the behaviors that have adopted, or immediately. We work on empathy, asking them: “How to make you feel the words that you said dude?”, “What have you done?”. We also help with the bully, which, in turn, is a victim also him of his insecurity that expresses itself through the aggression: we will work on his weaknesses. Surely he has many. The word can do a lot to combat bullying and cyberbullying. Let’s use good.
*psychotherapist and president Ass.ne Naz.the.You. (Dependencies, technological, TagliaGAP and Cyberbullying)
“The Republic will fight always in defense of the freedom of information, to its readers and to all those who have at heart the principles of democracy and civil coexistence”
Carlo Verdelli SUBSCRIBERS TO REPUBLIC © Reproduction reserved Today on the Prescription, it speaks Renzi: “We will stop in one way or another. Count change step” Bonafede under siege. It is on changes or referral, small Fish big fish Viva la backed Virus, escape from China. Paris, Berlin and London: “If you can go home”
the Republic
